Episode 1: Who Are You?
Listen to learn…
- A tool to help you know yourself and others better
- The power of changing your story
- Why circle is so powerful for creating connection
- The purpose of life (!)
Who are you? is the question I ask all my circle guests. In this episode, I hold the talking piece and answer that question myself.
What’s in this episode for you:
An amazing way to introduce yourself that will have you laughing, and crying, and craving homebaked cookies - See prompts below and take this tool with you to all your gatherings to create connection
A story that will show you that you can change your story at any time and change your life in the process
Why Circle Dialogue is so powerful for healing divides
The purpose of life (that’s right - if you’ve been waiting for this answer, it’s right here!)
Poem: Opening Ceremony by Tanya Markul, The She Book
To the North within you, may you express the wisdom of your true self.
To the West within you, may you be reborn with every season.
To the South within you, may you hear the counsel of your heart.
To the East within you, may you be blessed with inner illumination.
To all Above that is within you, may you be guided by angels and divinity.
To all Below that is within you, may you discover the blessing of your shadow.
To the Spirit within you, may you find your way home.
This is one of my favourite poetry books. If you’re a human, you’ll relate to her prose.
A connection tool: This amazing set of prompts will deepen your knowledge of yourself and others. Take five minutes to jot down the first thoughts that come to your mind for the following prompts. Then put it all together starting with the sentence stem, “I am from….”. Take turns reading poems and soak up humanity
Place of birth/family ancestry
The foods you grew up eating
Something you were told as a child
A childhood memory that brings you joy
Spiritual practice (or lack thereof)
Songs or music you listened to
Exercise idea comes from Motivating the Masses.
Pick up the talking piece:
Don’t forget to share your "I am from" poem or any other words from your heart right here on the webpage. What came up for you as you listened to this episode? I'd love to hear.
Gratitude:
Circle of Change is recorded on lək̓ʷəŋən territories.
Our opening and closing music was created by the talented E-Rol Beats. You can find his creations at www.erolbeats.com
My fabulous podcast coach, Mary Chan of Organized Sound Productions, brought this podcast to life www.organizedsound.ca
Transcript:
Change begins from within. As easy as it is to look outside of ourselves and want the world to change, the truth is, it never will if we remain the same. This podcast was created for changemakers like you who want more love and connection in your community. Today you are going to hear stories that will inspire you, and also challenge you to be the change. We are going to go deep, my friend, so take a deep breath and settle in. My name is Ame-Lia Tamburrini - Welcome to the Circle of Change.
Well, here we are, our first circle. I am so grateful and glad that you are here with me today. To begin, I want to read a poem. This is something I will do at the beginning of every circle as a way to welcome you into this space. It's also a nice transition from wherever it is you might be coming from into this more sacred space where we're really practicing getting present with ourselves and with the stories that are about to be shared.
Today, this poem that I'm going to read is from one of my favorite poetry books called, “The She Book,” by Tanya Markul. The poem is called, “Opening Ceremony:”
To the North star within you, may you express the wisdom of your true self. To the West within you, may you be reborn with every season. To the South within you, may you hear the council of your heart. To the East within you, may you be blessed with inner illumination. To all above that is within you, may you be guided by angels and divinity. To all below that is within you, may you discover the blessings of your shadow. To the Spirit within you, may you find your way home.
Today, I'm going to answer the question, Who am I? It’s a question that I'm going to ask all the guests that join us in circle as part of check-in round, and I thought it only fair that I also answer this question. I'm going to answer it in a bit of a fun way, by finishing the sentence, I am from...
This was something I recently learned through this amazing program that I'm in, and it's a tool that you can take to your conversations, in your community, in your workplace, your family, even with your friends, just to deepen your knowing of one another. So give it a try once you hear it, if it resonates with you and you like it.
I am from a fresh off the boat, Italian immigrant father, who came to the land of possibility and a homegrown Mennonite farm girl who was so deeply rooted in family values. I am from religious hypocrisy and Sunday school, and also, psychic mediums. I’m from a really small rural town of 5000 people, where everybody knows your business. And exotic trips to Hawaii, and Bermuda and Japan where I was just this small pebble in this huge sea of differentness.
And from an excruciatingly long five year divorce and custody battle. And endless days spent frolicking on the largest freshwater beach in the world. I am from department store child modeling, to winning first place in almost every sport that I tried. I am from pork chops that tasted like charcoal, to my grandmother's homemade oatmeal cookies that just crumbled in your hand. Oh and homemade, fresh pasta from my Italian neighbor that would just melt in your mouth. And, I'm from MC Hammer, mm-hmm, yeah, don't touch this. I'm from Amore and I'm from Crosby, Stills Nash and Young.
When I look at this diverse mishmash of fragments, it makes so much sense to me why I love what I do today. Because the thing is when I look at the world I don't see sides. And yes, I know that they exist. There are so many ways that we can take sides today, but it doesn't make sense to how I see the world, today. I see the world in circles. As this beautiful collection of fragments that make up the whole. And I mean, after all, we do live on a planet, right, that we know by now is circular, that spins on an axis and goes around the sun and kind of in a circle.
So when I look at the world, I do, I see all these fragments and the particles that make it up and how the collection of them makes up the whole. So when I discovered circle dialogue, oh gosh, this tool that brings people together in a circular shape, and where people share their stories, these fragments of their life. And then those fragments start to connect, and strengthen the whole, as people see themselves in the other. It's this beautiful thing, so when I discovered it, oh gosh, it was like putting on a worn leather glove. You know, that just feels so soft on your skin. That smells of the earth and it just felt like home to me.
Today I get to help leaders bring circle dialogue into their communities as a way to heal long standing divides that are eroding community wellbeing and stalling progress, and help them create connected communities that collaborate and co-create innovative solutions to their most divisive and pressing problems.
It's pretty amazing when I think about it because when I look back at all those fragments, I know that I didn't always appreciate all the pieces of where I was from. I felt pretty victimized, for a really long time - about being told that my looks mattered more than my voice. Or just having this ingrained feeling that girls were second-class citizens to boys.
Those stories really ran my life for, well over 37 years, until I had a series of wake-up calls. The death of my father. A heartbreaking breakup with a guy that I really loved. And then, cancer.
Sometimes it takes a major event to clear away the fog. We go about life on autopilot thinking that this is the best it can get, until something comes along and grabs our attention. Sometimes we get tapped. And then nudged. And then wacked. And sometimes, if we don't pay attention. We get run over.
Have you ever wondered if there was more to life. If there was something on the other side of that, apathy, loneliness, or anger, that you might be feeling. After each of these wake up calls that I had, I paid a little bit more attention, but the biggest “C”, yeah, that was the final call. I could see that Mack truck heading straight at me and I did not want to feel the impact of that. I did not want to see what was the on the other side. So laying there in the hospital bed waiting for surgery that was going to tell me my fate, I decided that I was going to rewrite the story of my life. And I literally took out a piece of paper and a pen and I started writing. I decided in that moment that there was going to be more to life, and that I was going to do everything in my power to find it.
I knew that I could no longer keep blaming other people for my own unhappiness. And that I could no longer keep playing small and keeping my voice hidden. And so as I began this long journey of physical healing, I also decided that I was going to do the mental, emotional and spiritual healing that I needed to do. And I am so glad that I did because my life looks so different than it did before. Today, I am surrounded by love and I give more love than I ever thought possible. I live alone and I have never felt more connected.
I get to watch communities transform, and know that my voice created space for somebody else's voice to be heard. Knowing that my voice helped to deepen connection between people that were previously divided. Knowing that my voice helped somebody to learn something about themselves and heal just a little bit more. Knowing that my voice makes a difference. And I know that through sitting in a circle that everybody's voice makes a difference. And that is what we are here to do. This podcast is about creating a space for diverse voices to be heard. It's a safe space for people to share their stories from their heart so that you and I can know ourselves better.
And the result of that is more love and joy. We have forgotten that, that is why we are here.
And the way to get there is to know ourselves better by knowing other people better, because everybody and every experience we witness is a mirror for us. And that's really the beauty of circle because we get to see ourselves reflected in the stories of others and see things that we couldn't see if we just stared at ourselves in a mirror. And that's how we heal. And that is how we change the world.
So thank you for your courage to be here. I know this work is not easy, but we're going to make it as interesting and as fun as possible because life is about love and joy. Okay, so please celebrate the fact that you showed up today because just by being here, you are making a difference.
In the show notes you’ll find the poem and the author, as well as a few prompts, in case you do want to use that I am from exercise with your groups or your community or your family. It works well to give out the prompts and then give people about five minutes each just to put some thoughts on paper, it's not meant to be super scripted. It's meant to be fun, and it's meant to be exploratory. And so give people five minutes and then come back together and let each person share one at a time. If you do try this, I would love to hear how it goes.
I'm now passing the talking piece to you. If you feel called to put your voice in this circle, please head to www.humconsulting.ca/podcast and share your story there. I cannot wait to hear what has come up for you as you have listened to what has been shared here today.
I wish you love and joy beyond your wildest imagination. Thank you so much for being here in the Circle of Change.
I also want to express my gratitude to the following peeps: Circle of Change is recorded on the Lekwungen territory and I am so grateful to live on this land. Our opening and closing music was created by the talented E.Rol Beats. You can find his creations at erolbeats.com. And special thanks to my coach, Mary Chan of Organized Sound Productions for bringing this podcast to life.
Until next time, Ciao.